A Tribute to My Father & Teacher!
This is an excerpt from a book I am in the process of writing.
“I HAVE FAITH IN YOU!”
“DO YOU?”
As a child, I would listen to my father play his music on the stereo. He had a taste for music that in my mind was embarrassing and out dated, but nevertheless he openly indulged in his music.
Having only one stereo system in the house, I had no choice but to listen to whatever was being played. “My father took so much pleasure in that old record player!” He would sing from the top of his voice, he poured his heart into those songs. It was as if he were singing those songs to a particular person.
With complete abandonment, he always seemed to be removed from his present surroundings, giving off the impression of some nostalgic state of being. I never saw my father in such a peaceful mindset as when he would sing.
I know that these memories may have little to no impact in your hearts, due to the lack of information provided in these few paragraphs. Please allow me to enlighten your minds with a brief description of who my father was, and in what circumstances he always found himself in.
My father was a very quiet man, (probably the most humble man I ever had the honor of knowing). He was a hard working individual, who never missed a day of work, nor ever made any excuses as to why he couldn’t go to work. When he was given a task, he did it to the best of his ability. If he would make a mistake on a job, he would take it very seriously. He was his toughest critic.
As a husband, he never denied my mother any of the luxuries of life. Of course, they had their struggles as any other marriage would, but he stuck by her side until the day she died. My mother suffered a lifelong struggle with Cancer that eventually claimed her physical and emotional life. My father watched his wife be devoured by Cancer for a long period of time. You could see the effects this struggle had upon my father.
For the final years of my mother’s life, she was bed-ridden, which made it necessary for her to have a Medical Bed (like the ones in hospitals). My father chose to remove their bedroom set, and get her the bed she required. He slept by the side of her bed with a blanket on a Stone Tile Floor for the remainder of her life. Can you imagine how achy his body must have been? I’ve slept on a few floors in my lifetime, and I know that after only one night I would wake up feeling as if I had been the victim of a brutal beating. This speaks very loudly about his Devotion and Love for his wife.
As a father, he tried the best he could to provide for his children. I will also add that we never lacked in any area concerning physical or spiritual needs. He raised us in the teachings of Christ and was very strict concerning Church attendance.
I will never forget my most embarrassing moment in life. On one occasion, when we had just moved to Puerto Rico, we were at a Church Service that my grandparents held. I was 15, and I had just met my puppy love. I thought I could do whatever I chose to, so I left the service and went across the street to hang out with my girlfriend and her other friends. There were about 10 -12 of us sitting around.
When my father saw that I was not in the service, he calmly crossed the street and in the presence of all my new-found friends, slapped me right across my face. Then he ordered me to return to the service. I began to walk across the street with my head down and tears running down my face, not because it hurt, but because I had been embarrassed in front of all my new friends and girlfriend.
Concerning education, we were sent to the best of schools. My father knew the importance of education. Not because he was well-educated, but on the contrary, he had to drop out from eighth grade in order to help feed his family. His family was very poor, to the extent that they would walk to school bare-foot many a times.
He had a lot of circumstances working against him. He suffered from a nerve disorder, which caused him to shy away from people. He seemed to fall in and out of depression, which included mood swings and anxiety attacks. Similarly, as my mother, he also struggled with Cancer which eventually overpowered him and was the cause of his death.
Right before my mother’s death, I became involved in drug dealing which eventually led to joining a notorious gang, then inevitably, drug addiction. Now my father found himself in a position where he felt obligated to ask me to leave our house. I will never forget his words, “Jesus Loves You” he cried, gushing in tears as he begged me to stop doing the things I was doing. As he stood in front of the gates of the house, he said,
“I BELIEVE YOU ARE BETTER THAN THIS, BUT YOU DON’T!”
I continued in rebellion for many years.
The last time I saw my father was March 6th, 1994. I was never granted the privilege to come in physical contact with my father ever again. Five days before his death in 2005, God granted him his desire to speak with me. I must admit that God truly granted me favor on that day. I desperately desired to ask my father for forgiveness.
After an emotionally exhausting and liberating conversation, his words became passionate. He testified about his own life saying, “God believed that I would make it through all my struggles, He was just waiting for me to do the same! When I did, things became easier to deal with!”
After these words, we began to cry with one another and to tell each other how much we meant to the other.
His last words to me were: “I LOVE YOU & I BELIEVE THAT GOD HAS GIVEN YOU THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE. HAVE FAITH IN YOUR GOD-GIVEN ABILITIES MY SON. ALWAYS REMEMBER, JESUS LOVES YOU!
Now I know to whom my father sang those songs with so much Passion!
He sang them to CHRIST!
As I Do!
This is an excerpt from a book I am in the process of writing.
“I HAVE FAITH IN YOU!”
“DO YOU?”
As a child, I would listen to my father play his music on the stereo. He had a taste for music that in my mind was embarrassing and out dated, but nevertheless he openly indulged in his music.
Having only one stereo system in the house, I had no choice but to listen to whatever was being played. “My father took so much pleasure in that old record player!” He would sing from the top of his voice, he poured his heart into those songs. It was as if he were singing those songs to a particular person.
With complete abandonment, he always seemed to be removed from his present surroundings, giving off the impression of some nostalgic state of being. I never saw my father in such a peaceful mindset as when he would sing.
I know that these memories may have little to no impact in your hearts, due to the lack of information provided in these few paragraphs. Please allow me to enlighten your minds with a brief description of who my father was, and in what circumstances he always found himself in.
My father was a very quiet man, (probably the most humble man I ever had the honor of knowing). He was a hard working individual, who never missed a day of work, nor ever made any excuses as to why he couldn’t go to work. When he was given a task, he did it to the best of his ability. If he would make a mistake on a job, he would take it very seriously. He was his toughest critic.
As a husband, he never denied my mother any of the luxuries of life. Of course, they had their struggles as any other marriage would, but he stuck by her side until the day she died. My mother suffered a lifelong struggle with Cancer that eventually claimed her physical and emotional life. My father watched his wife be devoured by Cancer for a long period of time. You could see the effects this struggle had upon my father.
For the final years of my mother’s life, she was bed-ridden, which made it necessary for her to have a Medical Bed (like the ones in hospitals). My father chose to remove their bedroom set, and get her the bed she required. He slept by the side of her bed with a blanket on a Stone Tile Floor for the remainder of her life. Can you imagine how achy his body must have been? I’ve slept on a few floors in my lifetime, and I know that after only one night I would wake up feeling as if I had been the victim of a brutal beating. This speaks very loudly about his Devotion and Love for his wife.
As a father, he tried the best he could to provide for his children. I will also add that we never lacked in any area concerning physical or spiritual needs. He raised us in the teachings of Christ and was very strict concerning Church attendance.
I will never forget my most embarrassing moment in life. On one occasion, when we had just moved to Puerto Rico, we were at a Church Service that my grandparents held. I was 15, and I had just met my puppy love. I thought I could do whatever I chose to, so I left the service and went across the street to hang out with my girlfriend and her other friends. There were about 10 -12 of us sitting around.
When my father saw that I was not in the service, he calmly crossed the street and in the presence of all my new-found friends, slapped me right across my face. Then he ordered me to return to the service. I began to walk across the street with my head down and tears running down my face, not because it hurt, but because I had been embarrassed in front of all my new friends and girlfriend.
Concerning education, we were sent to the best of schools. My father knew the importance of education. Not because he was well-educated, but on the contrary, he had to drop out from eighth grade in order to help feed his family. His family was very poor, to the extent that they would walk to school bare-foot many a times.
He had a lot of circumstances working against him. He suffered from a nerve disorder, which caused him to shy away from people. He seemed to fall in and out of depression, which included mood swings and anxiety attacks. Similarly, as my mother, he also struggled with Cancer which eventually overpowered him and was the cause of his death.
Right before my mother’s death, I became involved in drug dealing which eventually led to joining a notorious gang, then inevitably, drug addiction. Now my father found himself in a position where he felt obligated to ask me to leave our house. I will never forget his words, “Jesus Loves You” he cried, gushing in tears as he begged me to stop doing the things I was doing. As he stood in front of the gates of the house, he said,
“I BELIEVE YOU ARE BETTER THAN THIS, BUT YOU DON’T!”
I continued in rebellion for many years.
The last time I saw my father was March 6th, 1994. I was never granted the privilege to come in physical contact with my father ever again. Five days before his death in 2005, God granted him his desire to speak with me. I must admit that God truly granted me favor on that day. I desperately desired to ask my father for forgiveness.
After an emotionally exhausting and liberating conversation, his words became passionate. He testified about his own life saying, “God believed that I would make it through all my struggles, He was just waiting for me to do the same! When I did, things became easier to deal with!”
After these words, we began to cry with one another and to tell each other how much we meant to the other.
His last words to me were: “I LOVE YOU & I BELIEVE THAT GOD HAS GIVEN YOU THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE. HAVE FAITH IN YOUR GOD-GIVEN ABILITIES MY SON. ALWAYS REMEMBER, JESUS LOVES YOU!
Now I know to whom my father sang those songs with so much Passion!
He sang them to CHRIST!
As I Do!
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